A team of brave reviewers embark upon a marathon of straight-to-DVD stocking fillers.Written by Ben Jackson on 10th December 2013
Aldi Poem !
There is a store called Aldi, In the heart of Selly Oak, That I rely on ever so badly, Because I’m always broke. From buying pre drinks for Fab, To stocking up on all my food, An Aldi shop is never drab, As it always gets me in a good mood. Forever sprinting round the […]
In the heart of Selly Oak,
That I rely on ever so badly,
Because I’m always broke.
From buying pre drinks for Fab,
To stocking up on all my food,
An Aldi shop is never drab,
As it always gets me in a good mood.
Forever sprinting round the store,
Fearful of bumping into a friend,
Barely avoiding the stains on the floor,
Which may bring my life to an end.
Yet we run into each other mid-shop,
And our secret has been exposed to the full,
buying drinks at the bar has got to stop,
As we just can’t afford that vodka redbull.
So on I go laden with all my drink,
Humming that annoying one direction song,
But at the checkout my heart begins to sink,
As every queue is thirty metres long.
Suddenly I hear that joyful ring,
Causing my spirit to burst free,
The flowers bloom and the birds sing,
Because Sue has just opened till three.
I make a bid for the front of the line,
Feeling like I have won the race,
But before I can claim sweet victory as mine,
I must pack at an extraordinary pace.
I start to panic under Sue’s cruel stare,
Whilst other customers go insane,
Stashing my items without due care,
A pretence of cool to maintain.
At long last I can now pay the bill,
With my food for the week secure,
The low cost as ever giving me a thrill,
Oh how I love that delightful store.